I Am Beautiful

I was just watching ‘The Undateables" and there was a girl who had a blood disease that caused her lips and nose to actually rot and fall off… So basically there is a black hole where her nose is meant to be and she doesn’t have a mouth, just teeth.
She said something that really broke my heart:

“If I don’t like the way I look, how can I expect someone else to like me?”

Wow.

Now I’m not going to pretend I'm all “holier than thou” and all that, of course attraction is important and if I see a good looking guy, I’m obviously going to give him a bit more attention than a Gollum lookalike (sorry Gollum, but I don’t think I want to be your “precious” any time soon ;) )

2016 was a tough year for me in terms of my self-esteem. I obsessively wanted to lose weight because I had an insecurity about having “big” legs. A few comments about “thunder thighs” and “vet gat” really made me hate my legs and hips, so much in fact that I actually didn’t realize how thin I was getting. Thank the good Lord I never became anorexic, but I was deemed underweight and didn’t have my period for a year. I was so, so unhappy but I am very glad to say I actually really love myself now (seriously, you should see all my selfies on my phone and you’d see!). I had amazing support from family and friends and I’m healthy now (okay, so maybe I got a bit jiggly with Christmas eve dinner, Christmas day lunch and New Years celebrations… hehe totally worth it!!!) so thank you so much to everyone who was there for me!
But anyway, I was so engrossed with my body that I wasted my first semester not wanting to do things or meet people incase I had to eat something unhealthy or miss gym. Yup, silly I know! However, no point in stressing about the past, but at least now I am trying to make the most of every single moment.

Enough about me, I have met so many people recently who are unhappy with the way they look because of people’s comments. Please, please be careful about what you say. Something you say that you think is meaningless could actually mean the world to someone else; this can be both positive and negative. Instead of telling someone they’re gaining weight or maybe that new bright yellow streak they decided to put in their hair looks a bit weird, embrace their positive attributes instead and choose to compliment instead of disrespect.

People have insecurities. I met a guy on the plane the other day who told me he was very conscious about how skinny he is and he wishes he could get bigger. I met a very beautifully toned girl this year who wishes she had no muscle whatsoever. I met a guy at gym with the best physique I have ever seen, yet keeps thinking he needs to get bigger to look better. I know a girl with the most beautiful smile who absolutely hates her teeth. These are just a few examples, but there are so many more.
One of the biggest things I have learned this year is that you look best when you look how you are born to look: some people just don’t have those stick thin genetics, other people are born skinny and are able to eat whatever they want. I was born with big legs- no, not big, strong.
The way you choose to see yourself is the most important. This isn’t a motivation to go eat pizza 24/7 and enter into a sumo wrestling body competition, but it is more important to be healthy than super skinny or super ripped or whatnot. Happiness is the end goal and the sad truth is that happiness is deeper than just appearance. What society tells you is beautiful isn’t beautiful to everyone.

Think about it: ever walk at the beach and your mate says, “Wow, that guy is YUMMY” and you’re like, “Uh, I think you need glasses ‘cause the only yummy thing about that guy is the burger he’s eating”.

Everyone has a different definition of beauty- so you need to find yours; I mean really find yours, and then embrace that. Let your self-confidence be the thing that can help other people feel good, too. It’s awesome to exercise and be healthy but if it gets in the way of life, you maybe need to re-balance the scales and prioritize what makes you happiest. Again, maybe gymming 5 hours a day is what makes you happiest, then that’s awesome! But if not, then do what brings you the most joy.

I love 1 Samuel 16:7, ‘But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”’

And as 1 Peter 2:21 says, “For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps,” we are called to follow Jesus’ example which means we, too, should look at more than just the outward appearance.

God made you with a purpose and when He created you, He said “it was good”. Now God doesn’t lie, so the way He made you is something to be PROUD of. Be proud of who you are and embrace what life offers you. The girl with the blood disease I mentioned had a very successful date and he told her that after speaking to her and seeing her vibrancy, he stopped even noticing what her face looked like. When you are who you really are, you are going to attract the right kind of people for you, and those other people who tell you that you “have big legs” or “need to lose weight” or “need to get bigger” or whatever don’t deserve your time anyway. Time is limited, share it with people who will enrich it.

But most importantly, remember:

“You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you.”

                                                                                                                  Song of Solomon 4:7 <3